Kevin and Oscar: Snapshots Episode 8: Cozumel
Written by Jake Collins
Kevin scanned the beach.
'It's no good,' he said. 'I can't see any.'
'Are you sure it's the right time of year for turtles?' said Oscar.
'No, I don't guess it is, really,' Kevin sighed. 'It was July when we saw them, so I suppose it's too late in the year. And even if they were laying right now, it's way too soon for Donatella to breed – she's only seven, which is really young for a sea turtle.'
'Maybe we can come back in thirty years and see her, huh?' said Oscar.
'Yeah,' said Kevin, 'I sure hope so.'
'Well, seeing as there aren't any turtles around, we might as well get wet ourselves,' said Oscar.
'How do you mean?'
'I'll show you.'
Oscar proceeded to take off all of his clothes, then he ran down to the water's edge and started splashing around. Kevin followed his example, and soon the pair of them were frolicking about in the water.
'It's no good,' he said. 'I can't see any.'
'Are you sure it's the right time of year for turtles?' said Oscar.
'No, I don't guess it is, really,' Kevin sighed. 'It was July when we saw them, so I suppose it's too late in the year. And even if they were laying right now, it's way too soon for Donatella to breed – she's only seven, which is really young for a sea turtle.'
'Maybe we can come back in thirty years and see her, huh?' said Oscar.
'Yeah,' said Kevin, 'I sure hope so.'
'Well, seeing as there aren't any turtles around, we might as well get wet ourselves,' said Oscar.
'How do you mean?'
'I'll show you.'
Oscar proceeded to take off all of his clothes, then he ran down to the water's edge and started splashing around. Kevin followed his example, and soon the pair of them were frolicking about in the water.
Kevin and Oscar laughed without restraint as they rolled around on the sand, and ended up panting in a tangled heap.
'My mom was right,' said Kevin. 'I don't want to go back!'
'We've got two months left before we have to do that,' said Oscar.
'Yeah, but it's gonna feel like we're on our way home the whole time,' said Kevin. 'Once we're back on the mainland, we'll be heading back up the east coast and getting closer to the USA every day.'
'Well, we have to go back sometime,' said Oscar. 'You said it yourself – six months of paradise is enough for anyone.'
'I was wrong,' said Kevin. 'I love being here... and I love you... and I love being here with you... and I honestly don't think I'll ever be happier in my life than I am right now.'
Oscar smiled, and reached out to stroke Kevin's cheek.
'I feel the same way,' said Oscar, 'but there's stuff we both want to do back home, remember... and we'll still have each other, which is the most important thing.'
'Yeah,' said Kevin, smiling back at him.
'You haven't forgotten your dream of becoming a paramedic, have you?'
'I haven't forgotten it, no... but I have been rethinking it slightly.'
'Oh yeah?' said Oscar. 'Are you thinking of becoming a male model? I bet you'd get loads of work!'
'Isn't that kind of a sexist term, “male model”?' said Kevin. 'It's like saying “female police officer” – we just shouldn't be making those distinctions in this day and age.'
'Yeah, I guess it is sexist, come to think of it. But I still think you could do it.'
'What do you think I could model?'
'Swimwear,' said Oscar. 'And jockstraps.'
'Jesus,' Kevin laughed, 'you only want me for my body, don't you?'
'Mainly,' Oscar grinned back at him.
'Well, I don't think I want to be a model,' said Kevin, 'but I might withdraw my paramedic application and become a nurse instead – they have more reliable shifts, and I still like the idea of going on to train as a nurse practitioner... and maybe a children's nurse too. But I definitely want to be a medical work guy, no matter what I end up doing specifically.'
'Do you want to be a doctor?'
'I don't know. Maybe, eventually. They have access courses for nurses, to move on to doctoring... yes, I think I want to be a nurse for now and see how it goes.'
'Would there be any opportunity for advancement as a medical work guy if you did decide to carry on with your paramedic application?'
'No, not really – that's another drawback with the paramedic route. Obviously you start off as an EMT and then get promoted to full paramedic, but the next stage after that is what they call promotion to firefighter, and I don't want to be a firefighter. I mean, I totally understand why it's an excellent idea for all firefighters to start out as fully trained paramedics, but that's not the route I'm personally interested in taking. And I don't really like the idea of the step from paramedic to firefighter being a promotion, as such – it should be seen as more of a transition.'
'Or a conversion,' said Oscar.
'Yeah, exactly,' said Kevin. 'And the same is true for a nurse becoming a doctor, while we're on the subject. Anyway, it looks like I definitely need to tell the fire department I've changed my mind and then apply for the foundation nursing programme at NYU. I can easily commute – the nursing college is on First Avenue.'
'So you do want to go back home and do that, then!' Oscar said triumphantly.
'Yeah,' Kevin laughed, 'I guess I do.'
Oscar suddenly started giggling and said, 'Your dad will love it if you're a gay male nurse! I mean, that's how he'll see it.'
'I really don't give a crap what he thinks,' Kevin shrugged. '“Turn away from the homosexual life...”'
'He only said that as a hypothetical example of what he wouldn't say.'
'I know... but he still shouldn't have said it. He doesn't really understand... and I don't think he ever will; not completely. Hey, here's an idea – let's have sex on this beach right now, just to spite him!'
'In your secret heart, you don't want to spite your dad, dude,' said Oscar. 'I know you love him really.'
'Yes,' Kevin sighed, 'I do love him... and I know he loves me, and we do respect each other now, but we're very different people and I know we'll never be close.'
'Are you very upset about that?'
'Not very upset, no. But I do think of it as a... a missed opportunity, I guess.'
'A missed opportunity that's completely not your fault, dude,' said Oscar.
'I know, man,' said Kevin. ' You, er... you don't want to have sex on the beach, then?'
'Hey,' said Oscar, 'I didn't say that, did I?'
'My mom was right,' said Kevin. 'I don't want to go back!'
'We've got two months left before we have to do that,' said Oscar.
'Yeah, but it's gonna feel like we're on our way home the whole time,' said Kevin. 'Once we're back on the mainland, we'll be heading back up the east coast and getting closer to the USA every day.'
'Well, we have to go back sometime,' said Oscar. 'You said it yourself – six months of paradise is enough for anyone.'
'I was wrong,' said Kevin. 'I love being here... and I love you... and I love being here with you... and I honestly don't think I'll ever be happier in my life than I am right now.'
Oscar smiled, and reached out to stroke Kevin's cheek.
'I feel the same way,' said Oscar, 'but there's stuff we both want to do back home, remember... and we'll still have each other, which is the most important thing.'
'Yeah,' said Kevin, smiling back at him.
'You haven't forgotten your dream of becoming a paramedic, have you?'
'I haven't forgotten it, no... but I have been rethinking it slightly.'
'Oh yeah?' said Oscar. 'Are you thinking of becoming a male model? I bet you'd get loads of work!'
'Isn't that kind of a sexist term, “male model”?' said Kevin. 'It's like saying “female police officer” – we just shouldn't be making those distinctions in this day and age.'
'Yeah, I guess it is sexist, come to think of it. But I still think you could do it.'
'What do you think I could model?'
'Swimwear,' said Oscar. 'And jockstraps.'
'Jesus,' Kevin laughed, 'you only want me for my body, don't you?'
'Mainly,' Oscar grinned back at him.
'Well, I don't think I want to be a model,' said Kevin, 'but I might withdraw my paramedic application and become a nurse instead – they have more reliable shifts, and I still like the idea of going on to train as a nurse practitioner... and maybe a children's nurse too. But I definitely want to be a medical work guy, no matter what I end up doing specifically.'
'Do you want to be a doctor?'
'I don't know. Maybe, eventually. They have access courses for nurses, to move on to doctoring... yes, I think I want to be a nurse for now and see how it goes.'
'Would there be any opportunity for advancement as a medical work guy if you did decide to carry on with your paramedic application?'
'No, not really – that's another drawback with the paramedic route. Obviously you start off as an EMT and then get promoted to full paramedic, but the next stage after that is what they call promotion to firefighter, and I don't want to be a firefighter. I mean, I totally understand why it's an excellent idea for all firefighters to start out as fully trained paramedics, but that's not the route I'm personally interested in taking. And I don't really like the idea of the step from paramedic to firefighter being a promotion, as such – it should be seen as more of a transition.'
'Or a conversion,' said Oscar.
'Yeah, exactly,' said Kevin. 'And the same is true for a nurse becoming a doctor, while we're on the subject. Anyway, it looks like I definitely need to tell the fire department I've changed my mind and then apply for the foundation nursing programme at NYU. I can easily commute – the nursing college is on First Avenue.'
'So you do want to go back home and do that, then!' Oscar said triumphantly.
'Yeah,' Kevin laughed, 'I guess I do.'
Oscar suddenly started giggling and said, 'Your dad will love it if you're a gay male nurse! I mean, that's how he'll see it.'
'I really don't give a crap what he thinks,' Kevin shrugged. '“Turn away from the homosexual life...”'
'He only said that as a hypothetical example of what he wouldn't say.'
'I know... but he still shouldn't have said it. He doesn't really understand... and I don't think he ever will; not completely. Hey, here's an idea – let's have sex on this beach right now, just to spite him!'
'In your secret heart, you don't want to spite your dad, dude,' said Oscar. 'I know you love him really.'
'Yes,' Kevin sighed, 'I do love him... and I know he loves me, and we do respect each other now, but we're very different people and I know we'll never be close.'
'Are you very upset about that?'
'Not very upset, no. But I do think of it as a... a missed opportunity, I guess.'
'A missed opportunity that's completely not your fault, dude,' said Oscar.
'I know, man,' said Kevin. ' You, er... you don't want to have sex on the beach, then?'
'Hey,' said Oscar, 'I didn't say that, did I?'
Oscar exhaled heavily as he pulled his clothes back on.
'Just remind me,' he said, 'who only wants who for his body?'
Kevin laughed and said, 'The feeling's completely mutual, so far as I can tell.'
'Do you, er... do you know any more secluded beaches on Cozumel?' Oscar asked casually. 'For tomorrow, I mean.'
Kevin grinned and said, 'I might know one or two, yeah.'
'I'm glad to hear it,' said Oscar, grinning back. 'I guess we should head back now, shouldn't we?'
'Yeah, we should,' said Kevin. 'Adela will probably lock us out if we're not home before dark.'
'I've been thinking about what you said, and you're right,' said Oscar. 'It's a little depressing that every step we take from now on is gonna bring us closer and closer to New York.'
'Yeah, but I've been thinking about what you said, and you're right too,' said Kevin. 'It doesn't really matter where we go, 'cause we'll always have each other and that's all that really matters.'
Oscar smiled and nodded. They finished pulling on their clothes and shoes, jumped to their feet, and headed back towards their rented motor scooter.
'Do you mind if I take a turn driving?' said Oscar.
'Not at all,' said Kevin, 'but I can't promise not to tickle you from behind.'
'You should never tickle the driver!' said Oscar. 'Save it for later.'
'Okay,' said Kevin, 'I'll try.'
Oscar mounted the scooter, Kevin grabbed him from behind, and the pair of them drove off into the sunset.
'Just remind me,' he said, 'who only wants who for his body?'
Kevin laughed and said, 'The feeling's completely mutual, so far as I can tell.'
'Do you, er... do you know any more secluded beaches on Cozumel?' Oscar asked casually. 'For tomorrow, I mean.'
Kevin grinned and said, 'I might know one or two, yeah.'
'I'm glad to hear it,' said Oscar, grinning back. 'I guess we should head back now, shouldn't we?'
'Yeah, we should,' said Kevin. 'Adela will probably lock us out if we're not home before dark.'
'I've been thinking about what you said, and you're right,' said Oscar. 'It's a little depressing that every step we take from now on is gonna bring us closer and closer to New York.'
'Yeah, but I've been thinking about what you said, and you're right too,' said Kevin. 'It doesn't really matter where we go, 'cause we'll always have each other and that's all that really matters.'
Oscar smiled and nodded. They finished pulling on their clothes and shoes, jumped to their feet, and headed back towards their rented motor scooter.
'Do you mind if I take a turn driving?' said Oscar.
'Not at all,' said Kevin, 'but I can't promise not to tickle you from behind.'
'You should never tickle the driver!' said Oscar. 'Save it for later.'
'Okay,' said Kevin, 'I'll try.'
Oscar mounted the scooter, Kevin grabbed him from behind, and the pair of them drove off into the sunset.
